I was reading some news about Obama, marvelling over his charm and confidence when a thought hit me – self confidence is not a nature. It is rather, nurtured.
I don’t think a person’s self worth and confidence come naturally. Well, maybe some people have the natural ability to shine and strut across a room exuding fluid confidence. But I think for most of us normal folks, that shine requires work, or at least some form of substance. Hard work and resilience towards failure, among some of the traits. You can’t build a tower without first building the foundation. You need to feel good about yourself and know that you’re well prepared to have that fearless self assurance. Yes what we see is the glitz and glamour of the president elect’s seemingly effortless boldness, but who knows behind those closed doors he had worked his ass off to pull off what he did?
I have this horrible tendency of beating myself up for anything that goes wrong or below par related to every aspect of my life. I think I have a twisted God Complex where I think I can do anything, but is terrified of failing because I never believe in myself enough. And then it dawn upon me that the reason behind my lack of courage is because I have never really worked hard (by that I mean really hard) for something that I want (note: not something that I am expected to achieve), I have always have this lackluster laidback attitude towards things that I am passionate about, confident (a somewhat misplaced one at that) that I will sail through and impress with my natural talent. Music and writing, among the few things.
Well, still not too late to polish that pair of dancing stilettos and prepare to strut, I guess.